Published a quarter of a century ago, many of Tim Parks’ observations from An Italian Education still ring true in 2022 Italy. Chocked full of short vignettes that capture a Brit’s experience raising his bi-national children (his wife is Italian) in fair Verona, the book manages to walk the fine line of humor and self-deprecation without veering into snarkiness and offense. As someone who has now lived in Italy for a year, I read Parks’ stories with the satisfaction of a clubby insider as I’ve witnessed first hand the over indulgent attitudes of parents with their children (usually only one or at the absolute max two) here and daily meet their gaping incomprehension of our five children! When we first moved here, shop owners, waiters, restauranteurs, and random strangers would often see our clan and comment “you know there’s these things called TVs?” They thought it was hilarious and it got old quick so now we beat them to the punch, whenever, I catch an Italian counting our children with wide eyes who then inevitably blurts out “cinque bambini!” I quickly respond “ehh, non abbiamo une televizione” I’m telling you this joke KILLS–the Italian men especially LOVE it, there’s usually a 1-2 second pause as they register an American speaking Italian and then the punchline hits and you get the guffaw.
An Italian Education describes the life of a family in northern Italy and some of Parks’ most poignant observations are those which show the delineation between the stifling order of the North with the bewildering chaos and joy of the South. As an American family living deep in that southern culture here in Naples, I can attest to his experience first hand. Naples, in particular, carries its own distinct identity–from an American perspective it’s very Jersey shore, but I’ve heard Italians who’ve spent time in the U.S. describe it as redneck. Either way, it describes a particular unapologetic pride for its excesses (of tattoos, of jewelry, of makeup, of cigarettes, of chinstrap beards etc.) but also a sincerity and self-confidence in one's identity that can be equal parts endearing and frustrating.
68 Ponders the word cancello (“gate”)--and the way Italians use their gates to cancel out/erase/anual (“cancellare) the outside world from their home.
70 sogni d’oro (“dreams of gold”)
73 in bianco (“wide awake” literally in white) term used for sleepless nights with young infants
75 The brutal honesty of Italian lullabies: “you already make things so hard for your mother, she might end of thinking you don’t really love her”
93 che capitombolo (“what a tumble) term used for young children
94 In Italy, weeping is not something shameful but rather something savored. Instead they draw it out and embellish it
147 In Italy it is dangerous to go against the grain of what is accepted and what falls inside the group mentality
170 mammismo (the idea of the power of the mamma over her son) in Italian culture is its abnormally and excessive attachment between mothers and their sons
175 fiscale (severely exacting in nature) is used often when complaining about parents being too strict
271-2 “This would never happen up north” is an idea on the backwardness of the southern half (below Rome) of Italy by the northerners. Whereas southerners probably can’t handle to the germanic straight lines, order and heat of the north
274 stessa spiaggia, stesso mare (same beach, same sea) describes the ideal summers for Italians where they go to the same exact place every year throughout their life.
312 In Pescara along the coast, he describes the “growing inertia” of immigration from Africa and the influx of men willing to do the exhausting, menial labor that Italians have retreated from.
323 caporetto is a term used to describe someone’s waterloo, or greatest public defeat. It’s used to describe a politician’s scandal for example. Caporetto being the battle at which Luigi Cadorna suffered a great defeat as the Commander of the Italian Army in WWII.
